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| Friday, January 5th, 2007 | | 2:26 am |
Its been a long time...
Let's see...where to start... I need a new calendar I've maintained my usual winter vacation status is watching singin in the rain every night..and we thought we had lost it for awhile..but then found it at Jonah's..so I tried to catch up by viewing twice daily for awhile, but I sopped having enough time to do that. My room's been kept quite clean, mainly because of frequent visits from Aaron, but i've also actually started to put clothes away, instead of in the dirty clothes..or the floor. I re-read HP 3-6 once again, and am starting to feel sad that it's almost done, however quite excited about movie 5. After a rather small fiasco, my dress should be on its way and arriving rather soon. I hope it fits..and if it doesn't i'll just pad myself so it does. I haven't really been able to use my camera for much yet. Annie's wasn't worth taking pictures of..and neither was new year's for that matter...not that I didn't actually enjoy myself for once, but it just wasn't one of those nights, most likely because I was sober, which I really have been enjoying lately (for the past 4 months). It seems silly to pat myself on the back, mostly because it's not like i've accomplished some big goal I set for myself, but because i've actually changed and don't want to be that way anymore, submersed in the scene of people standing around drinking to get shitfaced. I started working at the deli again, and most days there's a total of 3 customers, who usually don't order sandwiches, and I get to watch movies and read all day. Bill will come sit with me occasionally, usually just to pay me, and then chat awhile, and tell me I can close around 3. My tongue hurts. I've been getting up in the morning around 9ish, which is un-godly early for me. i tend to take a nap around 11, but still the fact that i'm able to open my eyes is quite a mystery. Talya and I have hung out a lot recently. to sum that it i'll just say its very pleasant and i'm very much enjoying it. I keep holding in my pee's, ridiculous periods of time, when i'm in my house...apparently the distance from my room/couch to the bathroom is much too far. However strong the chances of seeing snow at the beginning of this vacation were, they've dwindled substantially into probable doubts. For some reason i'm starting to think maybe i'm just not supposed to see it. Ever. I also was planning on going to Disneyland at some point soon, and I don't know it that will be happening either. My finger, although straight in the morning when I wake up, throughout the day, its back to its crooked ways very quickly. Weird. I'll probably be getting sick soon. We'll see if I can avoid it from roughly 4 separate ways. I need to put on my movie. Goodnight. Current Mood:  amused | | Saturday, April 15th, 2006 | | 1:53 pm |
I don't know why I feel like crying all of a sudden, but I do. It's probably just one of those days, where I'm bored, and then start thinking about everything, and then my solution is to just cry. It seems that at the start of almost every vacation, I'm sick. Negatory on Dub tonight. Uber amounts of smoke does not sound like my idea of a good healing process. My dad and I watched Domino this morning. He gave it the thumbs down, while I commended its success for lots of shooting off arms with shotguns andwhatnot. I get so ancy when I can't do anything, and the puzzle I started yesterday is driving me nuts, so I took a break and sorted 5 loads of laundry. I hate school time because I go through so many more clothes. On vacation i'm just like ," eh i'll wear the same thing everyday," and then everything is fine. Its love how reba can tell when she's going outside, to go to the doctor. She just stands there, paws glued to the ground, thinking, fuck you, i know what you're doing, and i'm not gonna go for it. I really hope she's ok. Kaitlyn, mom and I realized she just turned 12 last week. Nar. First tournament is the day of prom. Which, speaking of, is just going to be a whole-lot-of-poo. No appointments at tranquille, my hair is just at such an awkward length, which leaves me no options other than to cut it. Nick's paying for my hair, and nails as his birthday gift to me. Poo in my mouth for finding a dress. poo in my mouth. Current Mood: high on excedrinCurrent Music: jackson 5 | | Tuesday, October 25th, 2005 | | 7:09 pm |
I hate the stomach flu. I hate throwing up. I hate being sick. ALL the time. Daytime television is probably one of the worst things that someone with the stomach flu is forced to watch. I've missed 3 days of brown. I'm going through withdrawls. I talked to mitch on the phone today. For a good amount of time too. It was fun. Time for a shower. | | Wednesday, October 19th, 2005 | | 11:17 pm |
Camels.
you know you're making sacrafices when after skit rehearsal your feet are bleeding and it took me 3 shampooings to get all the hairspray out. | | Friday, September 16th, 2005 | | 10:44 pm |
| | Tuesday, September 13th, 2005 | | 8:39 pm |
so... ya. my brain is just kinda jumbling random thoughts today. good thoughts though. Pleasant ones. I wish it rains tomorrow. We won. ya. | | Monday, August 22nd, 2005 | | 7:09 pm |
can anyone tell me a rough summary of the monkey wrench gang...? please? doctor today...i think i can still play...we'll see how this whole treatment goes...team bonding tomorrow. yay! yay for thompson...i love 2nd period...and brown....yay too. | | Wednesday, July 13th, 2005 | | 8:15 am |
| | Saturday, July 9th, 2005 | | 10:16 am |
I bought my car. And now i'm going to wash it. | | Monday, March 21st, 2005 | | 7:43 pm |
This is for Talya, because I said so
I was looking at the pictures of talya today that i snatched from her old photo albums yesterday, and I realized how much I love her. YOU. Looking at all your old memories, and your old life, it made me awkwardly sad, almost left out, like for some reason i missed out on those memories too. And then i started thinking, and i realized that most of the pictures you've allowed people to take of you in the past 3 years have been with me, and that i'm part of your memories now. That makes me smile. And the fact that im not afraid to tell you you've added fractions wrong, and you're not afraid to realize your wrong, makes me smile. And the fact that I can be grossnotshoweredin4days, and feel so comfortable around you makes me smile. I feel very guilty when I think about how many times we've lost our groove, and how easily we get it back. Our friendship comes so easily to us, and i just wanted to let you know how much I love you. Current Mood:  hungryCurrent Music: sexual revolution-macy gray | | Tuesday, October 19th, 2004 | | 8:27 pm |
i stole it from nick
TWO YEARS AGO, I... 1. wanted to fit in 2. met talya 3. was 5'3 ONE YEAR AGO, I... 1. was dating jacob ortega 2. felt like I fit in 3. felt like I actually was smart YESTERDAY, I... 1. had a really good volleyball practice that totally got my siked on it again 2. hoped it would rain today 3. sang TODAY, I... 1. was dirty 2. felt wanted 3. kissed someone THREE ITEMS I HAVE BRAND-LOYALTY TO ARE... 1. Abercrombie and Fitch 2. nokia 3. Nike THREE SONGS I KNOW ALL THE WORDS TO (THAT YOU ARE NOT ASHAMED TO ADMIT) ARE... 1. Ashlee Simpson-pieces 2. Duce Company- pandomnium cry 3. frou frou- let go TOP THREE LOCATIONS I'D LIKE TO RUN AWAY TO ARE... 1. my bed 2. disneyland 3. the luna's house FIRST THREE PEOPLE I THINK ABOUT ON A DAILY BASIS ARE... 1. wyatt/broc 2. my dad 3. my mom Current Mood: amusedCurrent Music: broc's voice over the phone | | Tuesday, October 5th, 2004 | | 10:07 pm |
JEAH JEAH!
Varsity lost in 5, it really sucked too. We won in 2. Really close the first game 25-23, and then we decided we were actually gonna serve over the net and killed them 25-13..hmm...? Meghan's birthday is tomorrow, i hate not being with her. I haven't seen her for three months, it definitely is super weird us not being together 24\7. Restructured day tomorrow! Schweet dude. Homework for Curtiss being collected tomorrow. I'm such a procrasinator, it's such a bad habit. Im starting to lift for track a little early this year. I'm getting so siked on this season, it's gonna be so much freakin fun. Katie's on a fast for 48 hours...what? Current Mood:  chipperCurrent Music: fly away-duce | | Sunday, September 19th, 2004 | | 5:58 pm |
I could carry you around in my pocket...
Hannah and I had such a good talk today. We were just sitting next to the bocci court and I randomly decided to start telling her stuff I haven't told anyone yet. And then she shared and then we tried to help eachother out. Shes such a sweetie. Homecoming is progressing. I don't understand how I have time to fit all this shit into my life, it's ridiculous. Last night was so much flippin fun. Pre-game party in cliff's car...a few shots got things looking a lot better. The concert was so much fun. JOhnny is probably one of the hottest, most gorgeous boys i've ever seen in my life. Ethan's house...priceless. Im running on about 3.5 crappy hours of sleep because kyle kept feeling my back to make sure i was still alive..such a weirdo. Current Mood:  confusedCurrent Music: pandimonium's anthem- duce comp. | | Saturday, August 28th, 2004 | | 11:50 pm |
Take a picture like you've got 21...?
School's here and already it feels as though we should be ending this year as opposed to starting it. I'm so lost without meghan here. I just always find myself having to correct my brain when thinking that i'll hang out with her. No trinity, she's 3000 miles away, not 2 minutes in the car. Weird how your mind gets so used to things and then has trouble changing. I still haven't gotten my routine down yet. I'm always trying to figure out when to take my showers, it's quite obnoxious. I got home 40 minutes before curfew tonight... Dance last night was probably the most fun i've ever had at a dance. None of the girls were there, and i really actually missed them. I got over it and danced with myself...and Jeff South! OW OW! Oh yes. I was supposed to hang out with Ethan and Anne today, but he went surfing instead. Went over to Brynna Logan's house, so random, and then got picked up by laurisa. Katie got pretty hammered, and the keg was gone by 9:30. Some party. Cliff's way too cool these days, I just don't know what to do with myself. Current Mood:  tiredCurrent Music: must get out-maroon 5-in my head | | Saturday, August 21st, 2004 | | 10:36 pm |
this feeling hasn't been here in such a long time. I don't think it could've come at a better time to tell you the truth. Its so reassuring, and comfortable. Already being said, a little taken aback, i'm a at a lost for words on the return. Oh this feeling is so good. Current Mood:  giddyCurrent Music: sunday morning-maroon 5 | | Saturday, August 14th, 2004 | | 10:13 pm |
Garden State is such a good movie. I finished the project for meghan today. Getting worked at a volleyball tournement tomorrow. Sore from conditioning. Let me complain some more. School starts in 3 more full days. Meghan has three more nights here. I'm tired of people being in my house. I'm tired of having to watch my language because people don't want to corrupt a five year old. I'm tired. | | Sunday, August 8th, 2004 | | 11:34 pm |
volleyball begins tomorrow. Although I am nervous concerning tryouts, im really excited. It's like i've had a volleyball revolution inside, and all of a sudden, im totally siked about it again. Weird considering like 3 months ago I told everyone I would never touch a volleyball again. HAH. Talyas last night was fun. Laying in bed talking made me realize how lucky I am that we're so close. I sometimes take for granted that relationship, and I really should change that. We discussed college and how we really shouldn't stress about it, but we do, and just highschool, and how much it sucks. Whoah, just heard a sound in my room...ahhh...anyhow. blah blah blah I need to get back to normal sleeping patterns before escuela empezar | | Wednesday, August 4th, 2004 | | 10:37 pm |
in two weeks I will be most likely up doing homework in two weeks I will be tired from volleyball practice in two weeks I will be sad because I'll be missing Meghan in two weeks I will be confused as to who my friends are in two weeks I will be entering a second year in hell yes. Current Mood:  anxiousCurrent Music: could you be loved-bob marley and the wailers | | Monday, August 2nd, 2004 | | 12:28 am |
intense dream...I gotta figure out whats bothering me
thmhull: i got diagnosed with cancer on my spinal cord tallywally345: aww tallywally345: talk woman thmhull: and they said it was terminal so they didn't even bother to give me treatment. They said that bascically i was dead and they were just waiting for my body to like notice. And i was talking with you about it, and we were crying at my house and you told me that when you die that you go up to mt madonna. And i said " god fucking damnit, i hate mt madonna" and got really annoyed. thmhull: So then after a bunch of just random encounters, we were up at school, but it was a dream school, and i was sitting curled up in my dads lap and i was bawling and people kept on trying to talk to me, but i didn't want to talk. SO then my dad was like, well maybe they were wrong, maybe we should get treatment. and i asked him if it was easy to cure and he said that it was. SO then you and i were walking down the hill and i asked you if you thought he was lying or not and you said," well highschool teachers don't really know that much, so i donno" BrunettaBeLLe xO: ok cancer thmhull: and then talya and i were walking down the driveway of school, and we exited this large rod ironed gate BrunettaBeLLe xO: means that u are feeling hopeless, grief, self pity, or unforgiveness BrunettaBeLLe xO: and since it was on your spine.. it means that something is happening right now that hits you right at the core, that paralyzes every aspect of your life thmhull: and i asked her if she thought he was just lying to me and she said" well highschool teachers don't really know anything so i don't know" BrunettaBeLLe xO: and the fact that talya was the only friend there in the dream.. means that talyas the only one who will tell you the truth about your situation BrunettaBeLLe xO: and your dad represents that there is only one person who can truly help you BrunettaBeLLe xO: maybe talya isnt the only one who will tlel you the truth BrunettaBeLLe xO: it means that everyone else wont really give you any inforamtion, they dont really understand BrunettaBeLLe xO: like she represents everyone else's ignorance thmhull: ya thmhull: damn your good at this BrunettaBeLLe xO: the gate represents a change in your life BrunettaBeLLe xO: haha!! BrunettaBeLLe xO: in school especially BrunettaBeLLe xO: wait was the gate opened or closed BrunettaBeLLe xO: thats important thmhull: we opened it to walk out BrunettaBeLLe xO: who opened it thmhull: damn it, talya opened it, and then i walked out first BrunettaBeLLe xO: ok BrunettaBeLLe xO: so before you enter this change in your life you need to.. BrunettaBeLLe xO: hmm .. you need everyone to understand, you need to come clean about the entire situation, or you need to make sure that you can lean on more than one person thmhull: well shoot, whats the situation though? BrunettaBeLLe xO: lol BrunettaBeLLe xO: i dont know what the situation is BrunettaBeLLe xO: its a change in your life BrunettaBeLLe xO: or like a transition BrunettaBeLLe xO: the fact that the gate was opened thmhull: as opposed to locked? BrunettaBeLLe xO: means that you arent ready to make the change until you learn to be able to depend on more than one person BrunettaBeLLe xO: or rely on other people thmhull: hmm thmhull: damn this is all so confusing BrunettaBeLLe xO: lol BrunettaBeLLe xO: it is thmhull: well thmhull: any suggestions as to how i would figure it out? BrunettaBeLLe xO: well BrunettaBeLLe xO: dreams are totally dramatized.. like it may even be a small problem BrunettaBeLLe xO: but then again if u had cancer.. theres got to be something apparent BrunettaBeLLe xO: thats not right right now Current Mood: confused | | Friday, July 30th, 2004 | | 12:05 am |
dude, meghan totally has seen me in my underwear....and megan totally wants to! |
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